Wow. Simply Wow.

An amazing thing happened to me last night at soaking. I've talked about soaking prayer here before somewhere. In short, this is how it works. Last night there were 14 of us. We all get comfortable, we invite the Holy Spirit to come and expect great things. Music is played, usually by cd. Our hosts, Amy and David, sometimes pray over us quietly and we just rest in Him. It's amazing.

Last night Christa Black sang over us prophetically for over an hour. So much went on for me in that time, I'm not sure I can put it all out here, but for some reason I feel like I need to try. As she sang she would say things over us that she was seeing and one of the things she said was that there were those of us who had lost or stolen dreams and that God wanted to restore those to us. Well immediately I thought "I've never had any dreams." It's true. I was never allowed to dream.

When I was in my teens my mother told me exactly who I was and even though it was all a lie, I believed her. After all, she was my mom. She told me many things, among those were "you'll never do better than getting a civil service job and you'll be lucky to get a man to marry you." My twin brother, on the other hand, had all the hope in the world. He was an artist. He could draw like nobody's business. He was a natural talent. Whenever we had people over, which wasn't very often, my mom would have him get out his drawings and everyone would ooh and aah over them. I was usually sent on to my room. Isn't that amazing? Randy was the creative one. Add to that the fact that my two older brothers were very musical, (neither of them ever had a lesson) and would play for us at church and I became the untalented one.

So that was one of the lies I believed. I became the girl with no dreams. I didn't attend college because that was above and beyond me (go figure - I was in the National Honor Society.) I became a file clerk, receptionist and later a secretary. For years that was not only my job, but my identity. So much of who I was became associated with that job description. Think about it. That was 32 years ago. File clerks, receptionists and secretaries were pretty menial positions. I had a best friend and roommate who was an electrical engineer. I always wondered why she wanted to hang around with me. I say all of this to get you to understand how deeply we take in the lies spoken over us and to let you know there is great and glorious hope!!

Back to last night and soaking. At the very moment I was beginning to realize the impact the lies my mother had told me had had on my life Christa stopped singing and told us that the mother heart of God was in the room. Oh my gosh! I received such healing in my little girl heart. Last night I was given a new outlook. I'm not sure what it means for me, but I look forward with great anticipation and expectation. After we'd finished with the soaking session they asked if anyone needed prayer. We prayed over one amazing guy and then they asked for anyone else. I didn't even know how to put into words what I'd experienced (and I haven't done it any justice at all here either). I didn't say a word. Christa looked at me and said, "I keep getting your name, Candy." I almost knew she would. She has an incredibly discerning gift like none I've ever seen before. She's so in touch with the Father. I told them about not having any dreams and I told them about the lies I'd believed. They prayed over me and saw things that give me such hope. Christa saw colors - lots of colors - she told me that anything the enemy has stolen will be restored seven times over. They saw words - lots of words - (I love words you know). Anyway it was so precious. I felt like I had been touched by the Father. Held. Loved. And given hope. And there was more - so much more. God is so good.

I desperately want to share with you how much love there is for you and how it is yours - your inheritance to be loved. The enemy has come to kill, steal and destroy us. Two of those things basically mean he wants us dead. The mere fact that we are alive is testament that we are loved and that we are being fought for. All we have to do is believe. Step into it. Receive it. It's so easy. I've been beaten down for so long. I love my mom so much. But now I'm being set free. Set free to love and to live. And I'm so excited about it!! You can be set free too. Ask the Holy Spirit to show you the lies you've believed and God's honest truth. Write them down side by side. Now really look at those truths. That is your inheritance in Him. That is your identity. You no longer have to believe those lies. They are destroyed by the truth. His truth. Let the LIGHT shine on those nasty things and watch them disintegrate before your very eyes. And know you are deeply and sincerely loved with an everlasting love.