Orphaned?

2010 is the year my dad died.  My mother died in 2008.  My husband's mother also died in 2010 and his dad died several years before that.  The other day a friend of ours asked Geoff if he felt like an orphan.  He replied that he actually did, as if somehow these deaths left them unparented.  (no such word, I realize that)  Fascinating.  I guess technically it's true that once both your parents are gone you're orphaned.  I just don't get it and I can't get it out of my mind - that question - "don't you feel like an orphan?"  I don't.  I really just don't.  Maybe it's because I quit letting my parents parent me at a pretty early age - 18.  But I like to think it's because I really "get" God as Father.

I love words.  I love to look them up in the dictionary and open them up.  So here's the definition of orphan:  "a child whose parents are dead, a person or thing bereft of protection, position".  (Technically we're not children but adults so I'm not sure "orphan" applies for us anyway but we can sure feel unprotected.)

Several years ago I attended a class on The Father's Love by Jack Frost at a local church, First United Methodist.  It revolutionized my thinking as well as  my heart.  Through that study there was a definite shift as I began to let Father God parent me - hold my heart and teach me how to truly live in freedom.  That's when I began to allow Him to protect me and I found my position in Him.  It was the best choice I ever  made in my life.  And I believe it let my parents off the hook.

A lot of the study involved looking at how you'd been parented and doing a lot of forgiveness.  Let's face it, none of us will ever be perfect parents, but Father God is the best.  One of the things this study talked about is how we deal with or react in different situations. They handed out a chart and down one side were reactions from an orphan spirit and down the other side were reactions if you were dealing with life through a spirit of sonship (identifying yourself as a child of God).  It was amazing.  When I first saw the chart I found myself nearly 100% on the orphan spirit side.   Then I began to earnestly work on my issues and I also began to allow God to heal those places in my heart that felt unprotected.  It's nothing short of a miracle that I now find myself more often than not on the sonship side of the chart.  It didn't happen overnight but I'm happy to report that it has happened!  What a glorious transition!  I think I'll dig that chart out and blog about it this year.

I thought if I wrote about this it would clear my head about why I don't feel orphaned and I can quit thinking about that haunting question.  I see now that I'm supposed to write about it.  I think maybe someone needs to hear it.  Once you choose Him, you are not alone.  You are protected.  You are cherished as a precious child. You are loved.

1 John 3:1  "See how very much our Father loves us, for he calls us his children, and that is what we are! But the people who belong to this world don’t recognize that we are God’s children because they don’t know him."