Real Treasure

I know I've mentioned Soaking here before. Every Monday night (whenever my schedule allows which is nearly every week) I show up at my friend Amy's house. There, along with anywhere between 3 and 20 other people, I plop down on her floor with a pillow and a blanket and begin to let go of all the world's distractions for an hour. An hour to be still. An hour to know. An hour to, hope beyond hope, hear from God. It doesn't always happen. Sometimes I struggle with thoughts and things that keep me from being still. Other times I sleep - a deep, peaceful sleep during which I hope I don't snore, but if I do grace abounds in this room. And I wake rested and at peace, a very different kind of "nap". I can't explain it. It just is.

I believe this last Monday night was one of those I dream of and hope for. This Monday I found myself standing in the doorway of a room full of treasure. It was a huge expansive room, filled to the brim with gold, jewels, statues, icons, all gleaming and welcoming me to run in and grab up handfuls or just walk by and place my hand on the cool beauty and see my reflection in the surface of some pillar of gold. Instinctively I knew this could all be mine. Then, just as suddenly, I felt a presence beside me. A voice softly said, "It's yours. You can have it all, but I am all you need." Those are the words that keep resonating in the depths of my soul. "...but I am all you need." As I stood there looking out at all that glorious treasure all I could think was, "I wonder is there joy, is there peace, where is love, where is grace and mercy and goodness and fellowship and friendship and where oh where will I find the One my soul longs for..." And I knew. I would not find any of these, my deepest desires, those things which make me live, in the roomful of treasure which suddenly looked cold and hard and lonely. I would find it in the voice of the One who stood beside me and quietly assured me He was all I need. And I believed Him.

Then there I was, waking up curled up on Amy's floor with an indescribable fullness which has lasted me at least until Thursday at 6:00 pm, as I'm writing this post. It's been a full week. Not full of activity or people or really anything but love. I feel full of love. I like it like that.